Anyone who knows me and talks to me on a regular basis knows that I do a lot of exercise. Probably too much but I listen to my body and if it doesn’t feel right I’ll skip one of my planned activities. By a lot of exercise I mean I currently try and do 5 yoga classes a week, 1 pilates, 2 dance (learning dance!) classes, 3 one mile swims and teaching my own Dance fitness class twice a week (which you know is intense). That’s not including any teaching yoga to kids I might do as well, though to be fair that’s not as physically demanding as the rest.
Needless to say, I’m good at some things but I have a lot to learn in everything I do. There are people in all my classes or the pool who are better than me and those that are worse. I don’t go to compete with them I go for myself. Sometimes I do look at other people’s techniques as each of our bodies are unique and so the way someone else does something might help me improve. I use that a lot with my swimming, watching how other people might be smoother in the water or how they pivot their body side to side so I can give it a try and see what impact, if any, it makes on my own swim.
So it drives me crazy when you get to the gym, pool, class or whatever it is your doing and there’s the huge screaming ego forcing everyone to focus on them rather than on ourselves. Just a few examples and my pet peeves:
- Mr ‘I am the machine’ – ok I understand you have a specific series of things that you want to do and you want to use certain machines for a certain amount of time to achieve that, but please be aware of those around you. No one will come up and ask you if they would like to use a machine that you’ve been on for over an hour but hey, maybe be considerate and move along. I personally don’t do weights, don’t like machines but even passing through the weights room or standing outside waiting for a class I can spot someone eyeing up a machine and a guy on there completely oblivious or not caring that anyone wants it. While he spends 15 mins on his phone finding the right song, or posing for the right arm flex. Please be attentive to those around you and move along!
- The Selfie taker – we get that you’re working hard, sweating and want to show the world. Maybe you have abs to die for and feel now is the time to share them but be honest with yourself, you look like a douche. Standing in the middle of the gym, posing in the mirror, making sure it looks just right with the right light so you can post on social media right there and then. Let me be clear, I like a good selfie, I hate a serious one, I always have my tongue out or pulling a funny face. Selfies are fun. They’re sharing a moment with people, but do it after you’re done. Don’t hold up those around you by standing in their way or looking like you’ll never move out the way of the mirror while you perfect this selfie. Some of us have hair that takes a long time to tame, I need that mirror space and I’m actually the one feeling self conscious standing next to you while you pout, flex and pose for that shot. Selfies are not good workouts.
- Ms Yoga ‘Pro’ – You may be a qualified teacher. You may know the next move in the sequence. Let the teacher tell it. Wait for them to tell us. What’s the point in attending a class if you’re going to be moving 3 moves ahead of everyone to prove that you can. The teacher then has to focus on moving you through your sequence ahead of the rest of us and when she corrects your posture, take the learning from it. Don’t give the teacher a look like she should never have deigned to speak to you. I love yoga as much as the next person and I do a lot of it. I can generally tell what is coming next but the only time I move out of my current position before the teacher tells me is because my legs or arms are shaking like an earthquake has hit that is ridiculously high on the Richter scale. Then the only move I usually do is to get back into my extended childs pose (or crying foetus as I sometimes mentally refer to it) to gather myself before giving it another go. Let’s be a class where we move relatively in sync, especially when the teacher tells us.
- Mr ‘I need to be in the fast lane’ – this is my absolute biggest issue with people at the pool. I’m a fair swimmer, fast enough when I want to be. When I got in the pool the fast lane had the least people, that’s why I got in it and yes I can keep up with everyone else, sometimes the odd overtaking of them but I try to slow down to match the people in the lane I’m in. When you get in the pool, I’m the only person in any lane. There’s a slow, a medium and a fast. Why you feel the need to have to be in the fast lane with me is baffling. I mean the lane speeds are dictated by those in the lanes, so if you go in the medium or the slow you’re the only one there so what’s your issue? It usually means that you go crazy and swim the fastest length you’ve ever done in your life to prove you are faster than me, get to the other end and need to spend another 5 mins catching your breath, even though it took you 30 seconds to swim the length, before you then repeat. I’m not going to change my speed to accommodate you, it’s very simple. I. Will. Change. Lanes. Yes, crazy as it sounds I will continue to swim at my speed, with my current stroke and move to the medium or even, crazy as it sounds to the SLOW lane!!! Then after 15 minutes when you’re getting out the pool because you’re exhausted and the other lanes are starting to get busy again I’ll move back to the empty or quietest lane, whichever that may be. Moral to this story? Read about the Tortoise and the Hare….slow and steady every time!
Anyway, just some pet peeves of mine, told light heartedly. I’m sure you all have dozens more stories so feel free to share them!!
Ciao for now x